"Avatar II: The Way of Water" Sucks
Do You Really Like Avatar, or Are You Just Attracted to Blue Cat People?
Avatar sucks. It is a weak admixture of other films: It is Ferngully and Dances with Wolves in space.
Avatar II: The Way of Water sucks even harder.
For starters, the premise is: "Let's remake the original movie but Jake is now a dad with kids, and we show Pandora's oceans and stuff."
Sorry, but that does not cut it. Pandora's fantastical setting impresses a lot less when the environment is underwater because, well, the ocean is already a strange environment and it is not possible to "exotify" it as much as one can on land and in the air. Floating mountains are visually impressive: Floating stuff underwater is, well, far less impressive.
Recycling the main villain, Colonel Miles Quattrich, also betrays a complete lack of imagination.
But worst of all is that they basically just repeat the plot line of the first film: RDA wants resources and are destroying the precious environment. And if you didn't get that RDA were bad people, now they have them engaging in whaling---just to make sure you received the message.
Of course, my criticisms of the original still obtain. Nothing is done to make Quattrich sympathetic---he is a villain in the mold of Cobra Commander or some other Saturday morning cartoon character. All that was needed to make him interesting was to start him out as a moderate to liberal minded military guy who became much more hardened and brutal when a group of radical, militant Navi killed him and his friends when they were initially providing security to a survey team. Anything that made his hatred for the Navi make sense and even garner some sympathy.
Much more interesting ideas for an Avatar Sequel:
1) A tribe of Navi to the South, under the behest of their monotheistic God, moves in to conquer the other Navi populations and convert them to their new religion. Afraid that the new religion, which is definitely not based on Islam, will destroy the sacred tree and force them to convert by the sword, Jake approaches the humans for help and makes an unforgiveable deal that causes his Navi wife to detest him. We could also maybe throw in some Aztec human sacrifice stuff and have a scene where Jake has to save some of his tribesmen from being offered up.
2) A mysterious plague is threatening to wipe out the Navi, and Jake and the other Navi fight about whether to trade with the humans in order to obtain a cure.
3) A less hospitable and more ruthless species than humans comes to occupy Pandora, and this time the Navi lose when they attempt to push back. Along the same lines, they find themselves forced to make a deal with humans in order to get out of their predicament.
[Having to make a deal with humans is the natural progression of the dramatic conflict, as it forces them to reassess the actions of the original film and creates tension among the characters. There might be other ways to do this, but I can't think of them on short notice. Anyway, that is why so many of these ideas circulate around this plot device.]
Okay, now for the less serious ideas.
4) The engineers from Alien land on the planet of Pandora and the Navi have to fight off a xenomorph infestation.
5) The predators land on Pandora and start hunting the Navi for sport.
ChatGPT's review of my review:
I would grade this review as a C. The review clearly states the writer's opinion that they did not enjoy "Avatar: The Way of Water" and provides some specific criticisms of the film, including the recycled plot and villain, and the lack of imagination in the setting and plot. However, the review also includes a lengthy tangent about potential alternative plot ideas for a sequel, which is somewhat unrelated to the review of the film being discussed. The review also includes some strong language and insults, which could be seen as unprofessional. Overall, while the review provides some valid criticisms of the film, it could be more focused and professional in its language and delivery.